Texas Overtakes California In Nut Production

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Coming of age in the 70's I was subjected all too often to the phrase "California - The Land of Fruits and Nuts." as a generalized complaint about the state's perceived unabashed liberalism.

I'm sorry to report here that while California may still lead in the production of fruits, Texas has overtaken California in the production of nuts of the generalized conservative sort.

We have Gov. Rick Perry and Ron Paul, Texas's 14th congressional district Representative.  Taken together anyone who hasn't lived in Texas during Rick Perry's four terms as governor would have to think Texas Republicans are a bunch of schizophrenics and we, the voters in Texas, need all of us to take some Thorazine and sit out the 2012 election.  These two particular nuts fell from the Republican Party tree, but from different branches.  

Then I wake up this morning and read on-line in The Dallas Morning News that a new species of nut has been discovered and this time it fell off the Texas Democratic Party tree, "the Democratic Party Republican Apologist" nut now identified as Martin Frost who tells us that Rick Perry is not an embarassment to Texas.

Excuse my cynicism Mr. Frost, but are you now working for the Texas Tourism Commission?  That Rick Perry has four times been elected the governor of this state is an embarrassment to all.  Come on Mr. Frost - from education, through environmental abuses, through insider deals funded through what can only be described as an insider slush-fund disguised as a source of seed-money for new business, to suggesting that Texas secede from the United States, which he now would have us believe he is best suited to lead as President, Rick Perry is a miserable caricature of a political hand-puppet, and isn't a credit to anyone.

Mr. Paul must be a nut.  He must believe in time travel and have a secret time-machine in which he can shuttle back and forth between the here and now to the time of the founding of this nation.  I wish it were possible to go back in time to readjust over two-hundred years of the evolution of our political and social institutions, as his stated policies would require.  But it's not.

His promotion of theses policies reflects a dis-associative gap between a completely idealistic wish and unhappy reality - of what is possible rather than merely desirable.

True, other states produce some significant nuts: the New York Spitzer nut which consorts with prostitutes, the New Jersey McGreevey nut known for hiring and stupidly firing his vindictive foreign lover while hiding in "the closet", the South Carolina Sanford nut usually found far away from it's tree, and the California Schwarzenegger nut (a prolific reproducer and invasive of other men's gardens.) 


But for sheer gall, hypocrisy and self-promotion in their quest for the highest office in the land the Texas nuts, Perry and Paul, there is no comparison.  The lesser Texas Frost nut, while well know already, has recently displayed a new trait - the ability to live outside of the limelight, root itself in very poor soil, only to sprout a tree in the most unlikely and unwanted places.

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